Thursday, December 30, 2010

This little piggy went to, um, um...

I'm not going to pretend that James and I are super parents, but i'll admit that we are pretty good ones! Maybe we are just naturals, OR (and i think it's this one) maybe we just lucked out and got an easy going kiddos that just makes us look good. Either way, i'm not complaining.

BUT i will admit there is one area that James and I are lacking in: nursery rhymes.

We have no idea the words to most nursery rhymes and kid songs. I sing "You are my sunshine" because i best know the words to that -- but it was until recently that i realized i was singing it in the wrong tune.

I mostly sing Top 40 to River -- edited versions of course. And James sings what ever pops into his head. The other day he was singing him the theme song to "Two and a Half Men." and yes, that song only has two words.

So i admit that we struggle in this area, but i didn't realize until this morning that James' struggle was much worse than mine until he asked me this:

"What did the first little piggy do again?"

Apparently James forgot that the first piggy went to the market! He's been telling River that the piggy went to the mall or to town -- depending on the day.

ReRe: How do you not know the words to "This little piggy?!"

James: Flog me, pull me out in the streets and flog me and tell the world that i don't know the words to "This little piggy."

Well, i'm telling the world -- the flogging will come later.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Doesn't get whiter than that!

so it's snowing all over -- except in Oklahoma (thank God!).
One of my best friends lives in Maine, so you can imagine what she is dealing with this winter. It's a full blown blizzard. There's only one way to explain it:

"It's whiter than a Glenn Beck rally out there."

Yes, this was a status update used to describe the Maine weather! I almost wet my pants when i read it.

It made me think of some others:

  • "It's whiter than a John Mayer concert out there."

  • "It's whiter than the audience watching Sarah Palin's Alaska."

  • "It's whiter than the dinner crowd at Denny's."

  • "It's whiter than a Black Friday line outside a Toys 'R' Us."

Monday, December 27, 2010

From the mouth of James

Wise things my hubby says:

ReRe: You need to start taking more pics of me and River. i have tons of pics of you and him, but not many of me and and him.
James: You need to start wearing clothes and i will take more pictures of you and the kid.

He has a good point. I'm sure River does not want a scrapbook of pics of him and his mommy, where i'm rocking out nothing but nappy hair, pajama pants and a nursing bra.

Weird things my hubby says:

Christmas Eve morning, James, River and I all snuggled in bed. It was a picture perfect moment as James and i held hands.
And then my hubby said the weirdest thing:

James: Is it strange that i'm imagining that scene from Ernest Saves Christmas were the old Santa is transferring his powers to the new Santa? I'm imagining that you are the new Santa and my hands are transferring powers to your hand.

Umm, ok???? Way to make the moment, um, weird.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

What's Complicated?

As many of you have noticed, Facebook has gone through some changes. I'm adapting and not whining like i have in the past.
Now, i don't know if this is a recent change, or just something i've never noticed until now, but what's up with the relationship status: It's Complicated. ???

Am i the only one that thinks this is GHETTO!? Since when is "It's Complicated" a relationship status. Well, i guess it CAN be, but why don't we just come out with it and be honest.
Instead of "It's Complicated, " you can put:

  • XXXX is dating a married man and hoping that he will leave his wife soon (it's only been 12 years)
  • XXXX has a baby daddy that she sometimes "hangs out" with
  • XXXX hubby is incarcerated so they are on a "break"
  • XXXX is in a loveless marriage, but sticking it out for the kids

I might change my status to "It's Complicated with James" just to see what folks say!

Monday, December 20, 2010

I'm Back!!!

It's been a fast 8 weeks. I can't believe The River Monster is almost 2 months old -- and i can't believe that today is my first day back at work.

It's going to be hard to not be with this little guy all day:

I'm sure i'm going to cry, but his sweet face will make 5 p.m. even sweeter.

Some things i learned while being a SAHM (that's what us BabyCenter addicts call Stay At Home Moms):

  • Maury Povich has fallen so far -- and i love it. I'm gonna miss hearing "You are NOT the father" every day at noon.
  • There are tons of folks who don't work during the day, and they love to hang out at Wal-Mart and Chick Fil a
  • Besides my stories, there's not much on T.V.
  • A 9 pound person can pass gas and do a #2 like a 190 pound person. It's amazing!
  • Once you enter the motherhood club, you forfeit all expectations of: long showers, eating a warm meal, eating with both hands
  • When other mommies see you just had a baby, they start asking you all kind of personal questions about your boobs and vajajay. 8 weeks ago no strangers asked me about my nipples (well, except for my crazy neighbor who was giving me tips on how to go into labor) so why is it ok now?! (the crazier thing is i actually partake in these conversations!)
  • James is super dad! and a great hubby too.
  • Hormones don't go away just because you had the baby
  • My dogs will bark at the mailman. EVERY. FREAKING. SINGLE. DAY. (they are the reason why i'm going back to work. they drove me freaking nuts for 8 weeks)
I'm happy to be back to blogging!