The bearded lady

River: you have a beard!
Me: um, no i don't.
River: why not?
Me: because i'm a lady. ladies don't have beards.
River: why not?
Me: because God didn't give me a beard.
River: Daddy has a beard.
Me: yes. he has patchy hair he calls a beard.
River: Why does he call it a beard?
Me: because he's delusional.

Deviled Eggs

I love when the hubby compliments my cooking. But i think this past Saturday he gave me a "compliment" that i just didn't know how to take.

Saturdays are our mornings for big breakfasts. So as we settled down to scrambled eggs, pancakes and hashbrowns, James said:

When we get to heaven, i hope you have to cook breakfast every day!

I guess he doesn't realize that if I have to cook breakfast every day, my guess is that i didn't make it to heaven!

Potluck Friday

Happy Potluck Friday!!!

1. When i returned from the gym this morning i found James and River washing dog #2. I was surprised why this would be going on at 7 a.m. Well, apparently in what James describes as "sleep nagging" i tore him a new one last night about only washing one dog, so he set his alarm to get him and wash the other dog. At first i felt bad, but then it hit me: He doesn't listen to me when i'm "nagging" him when i'm awake, so why the heck would he listen to my sleep nagging?! I feel no guilt Mr. James! No guilt! Ladies, clearly sleep nagging is the way to get stuff done!
   
2. Am i the only one who finds it odd and ironic that JC Penney is have a sheets sale in celebration of Martin Luther King Jr. Day? Seriously JCP?! Don't stop there, go ahead and offer deeper discounts on white sheets!
   
3. Today is a sad day for me. I will be spending my lunch break watching the last episode of One Life to Live. Those who know me well, know how seriously sad I am. I'm mad at ABC
   :( they should know by the tragedy that is the "The Chew" that canceling my stories to replace them with even worse shows is not a good idea. But what do i know? I'm just a chick who's been watching OLTL (that's what the cool kids call it) since the womb. I guess i can retire my VCR since i will have no need to tape anything again.
   
4. According to a commercial i saw the other day Golden Corral has a chocolate fountain. So now buffet eaters can dip bananas, strawberries and dried out chicken in chocolate! I think this is a terrible idea and screams health scare. I mean, once i saw a kid groping the peaches at Golden Corral. This kid was elbow deep in the peach bowl just squeezing them. I went and found a worker and told her. She glanced over and of course the kid was gone and she said "I don't see anyone." Oh yeah lady, i forgot: if you don't see a kid groping the peaches, it didn't happen. Reason #4,593 buffets are icky.
   
5. What's ReRe jamming this week? Adele, duh! Who's NOT jamming some Adele. Big Girls Represent. The song "Someone Like You" gives me chill. This girl can SANG!
   

Potluck Friday!

Happy Friday!!!! the last Friday of 2011!

So, as many of you know, last weekend James and I kept our 3 nieces (ages 8, 5, and 4). It was a magical weekend of baking cookie, watching Disney Channel (which i didn't even know i had) and making up answers to tons of questions because the true answers just didn't seem to be cutting it.
There were tons of highlights from all 3 girls, but it was my youngest nieces who truly stole the show, and it would be just wrong for me not to share some of those gems with my loyal readers.

So, out of the mouth of a 4 year-old, here is a very special Potluck Friday:

1. Along with gingerbread cookies, the girls and I also made cake balls. Strawberry cake with cream cheese icing! so as i was pulling the cake from the oven, my sweet young niece blessed me with this:
   Niece: (standing behind me) That cakes smells good!
   Aunt Re: Thank you!
   Niece: But your butt doesn't! Come here girls (calling her sisters), come smell Aunt ReRe's butt.
   Aunt Re: Let's not! That's gross.
   Niece: (she bends over and points her butt at me) Your butt is bigger than mine. see?
   Aunt Re: Thanks...i had no clue!
   
2. The girls were just so intrigued by River's diaper changes. I got questioned about why he pooped his pants, why he did it so often and just WHY! Lil Niece was the most curious.
   Niece: What's wrong with River's belly button.
   Aunt Re: (i'm mid diaper change). Nothing is wrong with his belly button.
   Niece: Uh huh. It looks funny.
   Aunt Re (i realize she's not talking about his belly button): Oh, that's not his belly button. That's his private parts.
   Niece: Why does it look like that?
   Aunt Re: Because he's a boy.
   Niece (shuttering in disgust): Ugh!
   Aunt Re: hahaha! keep that attitude for as long as possible!
   
3. Lil Niece's curiosity with Riv's bathroom behavior did not stop there. While i was finishing the cake balls in the kitchen -- because the girls abandoned me when they realized that the dipping part sounded funner than it actually is -- i heard Uncle "Bames" having the strangest conversation.
   Uncle Bames: Poop is not a toy. Bring that poop back here.
   
   Before i knew it, Lil Niece was beside me in the kitchen, swinging around a walmart bag with a poopy diaper. You would have thought she had a bag full of money. she was so dang excited. So excited that she sang me a song.
   Niece: I got the poop! I got the poop! I got the poop! (she sang this several times while twirling the bag with joy....it's the little things!)
   
4. I don't know who she was proclaiming this to, but as Lil Niece was walking through the house, i heard her say (to no one in particular): Boogers are sticky like glue!
   

Please turn to Apps 3:16

Our new family Christmas tradition (new as in this year) is to read the Nativity Story before we open our gifts. We thought it would be a good way to further the message to our offspring that Christmas is not about 5,609 presents under the tree...or even cookies, but the birth of our savior.

So anywhoo, it's time to bust out the story, and this is the conversation that ensued -- further proof that we are too reliant on technology:

ReRe: Daddy, you wanna look up the Nativity story so we can read it and then we'll do gifts.
James: Yeah, but i'll have to unplug my phone first (his phone was playing Christmas Pandora)
ReRe: Why do you need your phone?
James: So I can pull up the Bible app.
ReRe: Just get a regular Bible.
James: We have those? Like a hard copy, printed out one?
ReRe: Umm....???? YEAH! Like 3 or 4 of them.

I tell them where they are ....where we've kept them the last 7 years of marriage.

James (carrying the Bible in his hand): this is what we'll use if our app ever goes down and we need to upload a new copy!

Geesh!

Potluck Friday

Happy Potluck Friday and Christmas Eve Eve!

1. This is an exciting day! I will have 6 extra feet running around my kitchen today. My 3 nieces are coming to spend the night and we are going to be baking up a storm. Part of me thinks i'm crazy, but the other part is so freaking excited (ask me at 10 p.m. which part i should have listened too!) Riv is so excited. Right now he's showing his excitement by screaming on the kitchen floor. Oh wait, that's not excitement. He's ticked because i wouldn't let him play with steak knife he spotted on the cabinet. Mean mommy.
   
2. Christmas has br0ught on some hilarious conversations with my hubby. While watching "Mike and Molly" this week (love that show! Big girls represent!) We were laughing at Mike rushing around trying to find a gift for Molly, who was dropping tons of hints...that he didn't pick up on. This is soooo James. After 8 years, he still has no clue what to get me for birthdays or Christmas, whereas i listen to him gab all year and have plenty of ideas when occasions come upon us. This year we decided to do a couple's gift -- a new laptop. So that saved James hunting for a gift for me:
   ReRe: Are you glad we did a couple's gift so you don't have to be like Mike
   James: Oh yeah.
   ReRe: Why does picking a gift for me make you so stressed.
   James: Because it's a lot of pressure. I want you to know that i've been listening to you all year and know exactly what you want or need......but i don't listen to you.
   
   At least he's honest!
   
3. Another Christmas gem of a conversation happened last night when i was guilting him about not getting around to putting lights on our house 2 years in a row (last year we had a 2 month old so i gave him an out, but there's no excuse for this year!). So as we pull out of our driveway, i point to the neighbors house across the street and start the guilting:
   ReRe: See, they have lights on their house. Sure is pretty. I wish someone would put lights on my house.
   James: Yeah, they have lights on their house. But that's not what Christmas is about. It's not about giant blow up reindeer with lights. Nope. They may have lights on their house...but we have lights in our heart! That's what it's about.
   ReRe: Did you seriously just say "lights in our hearts"?!
   James: Yep. Lights in our hearts.
   
   So we spent the rest of the evening driving by houses that had huge light displays and saying "Their hearts are dim inside. No lights in their hearts!" hahahhaa
   
4. Epic fail of the week goes to the "great" governor of Oklahoma, Mary Fallin. Clearly Mary has never had a sick newborn, or uncomplicated birth. That's the only reason i can think of that would explain why she thinks signing a bill that allows an insurance company to deny coverage to a newborn. Thank goodness this wasn't in effect when I had River, who spent a week in NICU. I've never been more grateful for insurance or realized the importance of it. We are still paying off our portion of the NICU bill (counting down the days until May 15th ...my last payment), i can't imagine if we would have been responsible for the whole enchilada. Fail Mary Fallin. this is reason #4,839 why Jari Askins should have won. Boo!
   
5. What's ReRe jamming this week? "Good Feeling" by Flo Rida
   
   

Color Me Sadd

Pandora needs to stop playing Color Me Badd's "I Wanna Sex You Up" in the mornings when i'm trying to work out. I love the song too dang much to skip it, but it's just really not a good workout song. Why? For one it's too slow and i find myself slowing down on the elliptical or walking crazy slow on the track.And for two, i can't NOT sing the dang song...and i doubt 70 year-old dude on the track this morning appreciated me belting out "Come inside take off your coat, I'll make you feel at home..."

But honey badger don't care and i sang the whole dang song! It took me back to 1991...that was my jam. But listening to this song this morning made me realize two things:

1. It's very inappropriate that "I Wanna Sex You Up" was my jam in 1991...considering i was TEN years old!
   
2. And Bryan Abrams (lead singer dude who enjoys punching ladies in the face in Oklahoma City bars and became Color Me Sadd) sounds like a girl!

But despite those things...there is no denying that this song is the JAM!

(FUN RERE FACT: in 1992 i met Color Me Badd at Will Rogers Airport! I came in on a late night flight from visiting my daddy and they were there getting their luggage. I lost my mind!!! Besides marrying James and birthing the River Monster, this is definitely one of my proudest moments --i hear you judging me!)

Have a great day...and enjoy!

Potluck Friday

Happy Friday!!!

1. So please explain to me why texting and driving is unsafe, but Norman PD on laptops and driving is safe? Actually, i understand why texting and driving is unsafe...but i'm still at a loss as to how our (wo)men and blue can justify how looking on a laptop while maneuvering down Flood Ave. is safe. I saw this with my own eyes this morning. Me and Mr. PoPo side by side going about 30 down flood. Every time i glanced his way, he was looking at his laptop, using one hand to drive, the other to tap on his computer. Me thinks this be unsafe.
   
2. I saw the preview for the best thing ever: Celebrity Wife Swap! Wait, it gets better...Flava Flav will be on it. 1) I didn't even know he had a wife (WHO married him!) and 2) I can't wait for him to order his new wife to polish all his clocks daily!
   
3. In the last two weeks i've received more evidence that i'm getting old. Both realizations came from two of the kiddos i work with. I was showing one of my Littles a picture of Riv dressed like Mr. T for Halloween.
   Little: Who is he supposed to be
   ReRe: Mr. T
   Little: Who is Mr. T?
   ReRe: You know, the guy from that old show The A Team. gold chains? Mohawk? Big black dude in army pants?
   Little: I've never heard of him.
   ReRe: Well, back in the day he was like...like The Rock. Super strong, tough guy.
   Little: The Rock? Ohhh, you mean that old wrestler dude?
   Geesh, even my "current" pop culture references are old
   
   And the later in the week i made a Pee-Wee Herman reference and a 14 year-old said "Who's that?" yet, she made a reference to the show "Good Times" ??? Um, ok?!
   
4. What's Riv doing right now as mommy blogs? He is shoving hand fulls of cheerios into the dog's mouth (these cheerios are ones he has already sucked on).
   
5. When i get married again (to James of course), i'm going to walk down the aisle to this song by Bruno Mars. I can't help but to smile and feel like a giddy girl in love when i hear it.
   
   
   

No meat? that just ain't right, suga!

I am convinced that black folks -- especially older black folks -- don't understand the concept of vegetarianism (i'm sure there are plenty of other folks who don't, but this is my blog, i'm black, so i'm talking about my peeps).

I of course an exception to this observation because being married to a skinny, white vegetarian for the last 6.5 years has opened my eyes. But again...i am an exception.

So how did i draw this conclusion that brothas and sistas don't understand the concept of not eating meat?

Well, it didn't just happened over night; i've observed many evidential incidences:

1. My mama used to always make James chicken, or things with chicken broth because "i know he doesn't eat meat." apparently to my mama, meat was only beef and pork.
   
   
2. My family reunion came to a silent halt in 2006 when one of my aunties loudly said "He can't eat the greens cus they have ham hocks in 'em?! What does he put in his greens then." This was a double whammy: i had to tell her that James doesn't eat greens.
   
   
3. My baby bro always refers to ground turkey (my preference), as "fake meat" and he thinks i make it because James is a vegetarian. He is his mama's child.
   

I got more evidence recently when i called my Southern daddy to ask him how to make gumbo with the fresh okra i recently acquired. Now, daddy knows James is a vegetarian. We recently spent a week in Virginia with him where he regularly offered James crab legs and ribs, and then caught himself. But i guess daddy didn't fully realize what a vegetarian is...or maybe he didn't think James was committed. That's the only think i can gather from this conversation:

Me: Hi daddy! i got some fresh okra and i want to make some gumbo, but don't know how.
Daddy: Hey sweet heart. It's easy! First you boil you down a chicken. get it tender and use that broth as your base.
Me: Well, i'm not going to use any meat because i want James to eat it.
Daddy ( i can tell he's confused): Oh, this is going to be hard then. Ok. instead of boiling some chicken, just get some chicken broth. Cook that up with some onions..
Me: Ok, i'll get some vegetable broth.
Daddy: Why not chicken?
Me: Because I want James to eat it too.
Daddy: He can't even it chicken broth?
Me: No, because it's still meat...just meat juice.
Daddy: Ok, well, i guess you can use the other broth...but i don't know how it will taste. Ok. So then throw in some onions and some sausage in your broth.
Me: Ok, i'll definitely throw in the onions. No sausage though. What other veggies do you put in besides the onions and okra?
Daddy: No sausage in gumbo?
Me: No daddy, sausage is meat.
Daddy: So yo aren't going to put in any shrimps probably?
Me: No, no shrimp, chicken, sausage or any other kind of meat.
Daddy: Well, i don't know how to tell you to make gumbo then.

I saw that this could go on and on, so i told him to start from the top -- sausage, chicken broth and all -- and i would edit the recipe myself.

The gumbo was Ok....it needed some meat!

Hair on my back, foot in my mouth

Whenever James or I do something for the River Monster (bathe him, feed him, care for him), we remind him that he better remember all of that when he's looking at nursing homes for us. We figure we are taking great care of him, so he should repay the favor. Makes sense, right?!

Well, apparently my lovely husband has really been thinking about his days in Shady Meadows -- or wherever River puts us up -- because we had this conversation earlier this week:

James: Do i have hair on my back?
ReRe: No.
James: Good. When I'm old, i hope River puts me in a nursing home that regularly shaves my body hair. I don't want to be one of those old dudes covered in hair. I want to look good, so i can have my pick of the ladies and not get stuck with the chick who just poops on herself.
ReRe: Ummm? Where am I? Won't i be in the nursing home with you? Why would you need your pick of the ladies if I'm there?
James: Yeah, yeah. You'll be there. But you'll have dementia. So....
ReRe: So, it's ok to date then? Ok. I gotcha. Thanks for the insight Pat Robertson!

So note to Riv: daddy wants to be in a home that regularly shaves his body hair.
Second not to Riv: daddy probably won't live long enough to see said nursing home, and mama may be in jail!

Potluck Friday

Happy TGIF!

1. Just got back from Zumba! i love me some zumba. I love it enough that i got every Friday at 5 freaking 45 in the morning! But you know what would be even cooler than Zumba? A class where all you did were wedding/family reunion group dances like the cupid shuffle and the electric slide. Heck, we could even throw in things like the tootsie roll and the butterfly. I think it would be a hit, especially for folks like me that can't help but do the tootsie roll anytime i hear the dang song. No matter where i am, if i hear the words "Cotton Candy, sweet to go, let me see that tootsie roll" i can't help but do the dance. my inner 13 year-old comes out and i must shuffle to the left and then right and the front and back and then slide baby slide! Please tell me i'm not alone!
   
   
2. So the River Monster is going as Mr. T for Halloween. Cheap and easy! Daddy thought about going as the white haired, cigar smoking dude. But that leaves mama out. The A-Team didn't have a hip cool black chick member. So i asked James what i should be and he suggested Whoopi. ???? "Um, what does Whoopi have to do with the A Team?" His response? "She's black and was around in the 70s." Um, ok?! I'll pass.
   
   
3. Speaking of the things that come out of James' mouth. The other day i was wearing a new pair of shorts that have the trendy manufactured rips in them. I looked hip...for a 30 year-old. I asked him how he thought i looked. His response: "Cute! I'm really in to the skanky look!" That man better be glad he's a good baby daddy!
   
   
4. Quote of the week from my fish stick burning Lil Bro: "Don't be jealous because i'm sexy!" This came after i told him how ghetto fabulous it is to walk around town with no shirt and his underwear showing. Maybe i'm just getting old, but "sexy" is the last thing that comes to mind when i see a grown man walking down the street shirtless! River doesn't even sport that outfit in public -- and babies are about the only folks who can pull that off (and Jacob from Twilight).
   
   
5. The new fall lineup has started. So instead of what's ReRe jamming this week, i'm gonna do "What's ReRe Watching." I'm watching Two Broke Girls. It's one of the only shows in a long time that has made me bust out some serious belly giggles!
   

Ghetto talk, by James

One of the many reasons i love James is because he embraces his goof-ballness. He's the ultimate white guy (not Weird Al white, but close) and isn't afraid to show it in a variety of ways.

For example, recently he displayed his ultra whiteness with some little Eminem-inspired riddles for me.

James: Baby.
ReRe: What.
James: Where does Eminem go on vacation?
ReRe: ( i knew the answer, but i let him humor me) Where?
James: To the Be-atch!
ReRe: Yeah...i've heard that one.
James: Who's Eminem's favorite cast member of Saved by the Bell?
ReRe: Huh?
James: Scree-actch!
ReRe: (i think i wet my pants laughing)
James: Who's Eminem's favorite member of the Red Hot Chili Peppers?
ReRe: ( i can't name any members, so i was stumped)
James: Flee-atch!

It went on and on...so much so that i think we were late for work. The best one by far was this gem:

James: What does Eminem brush his teeth with since he doesn't have a flip top mouth?

RE-ATCH!

Now that was a pants wetter!

James: The Black People Whisperer

It should be no surprise that after 8 years together, James has become well-versed in the world of black folks and black women. He knows to not ever splash my hair when we are swimming (heck, he knows to never touch my hair), he knows what ashy means, and he knows his vegetarian self should avoid all vegetables at my family reunions -- because there's a good chance there's a hamhock or some other piece of animal in it.

Knowing all of this about my husband, i still got a kick of him sharing his black folk knowledge in the last week through two interesting conversations.

Black Fact #1: Black Don't Crack

James: I met pretty cool guy at work today. We are going to hang out.
ReRe: Cool. How old is he.
James: Oh, i don't know. Maybe my age, maybe yours. He's a black guy and you can't ever tell how old black folks are cus black don't crack.
ReRe: True!

Black Fact #2: Black Folks eat Greens...not spinach

James and i recently spent a week in Westpointe, Virginia visiting my dad and step-mom. We had so much fun. I stuffed myself on southern food and sea food. James mostly ate cheerios and spaghetti. When we got back we went to visit James' mom to tel her about our trip and let River visit Grandma. I don't know how the subject of greens came up, but t was awesome hearing James try to explain what they were:

"Like salad?"
"No, greens, collard greens."
"Do you eat them cold."
"No, they are hot, usually with some pig fat in them."

This went back and forth, until finally I did the ultimate no-no -- comparing greens to their arch nemesis:

"They are like spinach, kind of. The black people version of spinach."

If Popeye was a brotha, he'd eat greens.

Oh, no he DIDN'T...

So some of my friends have been raving about this olive oil and sugar scrub that supposed to make your skin feel baby smooth. So Sunday morning I decided to give it a try ...and i was IMPRESSED! I told River "in your face buddy; i'm just as smooth as you." I admit i got a little carried away with the scrub and we ended up being 20 minutes late to church -- and this conversation ensued between my loving husband and me:

ReRe: We are so late to church.
James: If someone hadn't taken so much time scrubbing herself with olive oil and sugar we'd be on time.
ReRe: Hey! It was worth it. Did you feel how smooth I am? Feel my feet. They are so smooth. Jesus would wash these feet!
James: Well, yes he would...he did wash the feet of hookers.


You will be missed James
1976-Sunday, July 31, 2011 10:06 a.m.
Cause of death: his mouth!

Taking the fun out of apps!

I'm probably one of the rare smart phone users that's really not into all the apps. Besides using the Facebook App daily, i use my phone for the purpose that Zach Morris used his cell phone: to talk on it. (i also freeze time regularly, but that's another post).

But James on the other hand is the App King. He downloads all kinds of Apps. But unlike folks who download fun apps, you know the ones where you can take your picture and then add 300 pounds to your face, or the apps that sound like toots (my mama never allowed me to say the "f" word), or other fun apps, James downloads "smart people" apps.

For example, he's recently been obsessed with this muscle app that has a diagram of the body and gives you all these details about muscles and what they do blah blah blah. One app is called "Speed Anatomy" where he has to identify a body part or a muscle within so many seconds to advance to the next level. He has another called "Prognosis" where he gets a pretend patient and has to determine what interventions they need. He said "it's like playing doctor." And another app shows him how to do joint mobilization. Oh and Science Millionaire. I could go on.

Basically James' apps are the abacuses of apps. In other words: Lame! They are like the butterscothes of Halloween candy. In other words: grandma!

Potluck Friday

TGIF!

1. I'm sorry i've been MIA on Potluck Friday recently. I have no excuses but laziness! Forgive me. Please?!
   
   
2. I want to wish a Happy 20th Birthday to Lil Bro! 20 years ago he came into this world causing ruckus. my mama had two very easy, no drama births prior to Lil Bro -- of course i was a piece of cake delivery because i'm precious and perfect and Middle Bro slid out in the front seat of the car..no joke! But Lil Bro was anything but easy. But he was worth the ruckus...and he still is. I heart you so much Jonathan. Happy Birthday sweet boy.
   
   
3. Is it ghetto-fabulous that River's toy chest includes the following: an empty Coke Zero bottle, and empty Red Diamond Ice Tea jug, and empty wipes container and an empty Enfamil container? Is it even ghettoer (or is more ghetto) that these are his favorite toys?
   
   
4. This is just your warning that I will be MIA for about a week in July. I'm having my good ol gallbladder removed. I heard it's all the rage with postpartum ladies. And a few weeks ago i thought i was about to be on that dumb show "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant" when i woke up with pains that took my back to the early morning of October 26, 2010 when i went into labor with River. The only thing different was that i knew i wasn't going to get a cute little baby in 16 hours. After some delicious IV pain meds and an ultra sound, it turns out i have gallstones (which by the way don't mix well with juicy hamburgers...or any tasty food for that matter), so i'm having it removed...and then enjoying a big ol plate of ribs!
   
   
5. Have you ever heard a song that makes you instantly wanna wrap your arms around the one you love and...well, umm, ya know?! Well, the song i'm jamming this week is that kinda song. It's "Motivation" by Kelly Rowland (the only girl Beyonce didn't kick out of Destiny's Child) featuring my boy Lil Wayne. (i love Weezy!)
   

My life on the wild side

So James and I recently got a Sam's membership. I initially thought we'd save tons of money on diapers -- but what i found out is just because it's at Sam's doesn't mean it's cheaper. So we still buy our diapers at Wally Word. But we are loving Sam's if for nothing but the samples! Is it sad that my favorite "date" is walking through Sam's with James. What makes it even better is that James is a vegetarian and a picky eater in general, so he doesn't like 99 percent of samples...so i get double!

Let me set the scene:

We stalk the best samples. If the sample lady is not ready (why does it take them so long? just set out the dang rotisserie chicken, it ain't gotta be an art display), we pretend to look at other things beside her. "Ooooh baby! look at these frozen peas!" "oh yeah, those look nice...all 66 pounds of them."

And then when she's ready, we SWOOP in.

ReRe: oooh, chicken! I didn't see these when i walked by earlier. Hey babe, here's some chicken i think you'd like!
James: (in his best meat-eater voice) Yum, that looks good.

We both grab chicken samples. I gobble mine. Once we round the corner and are out of ear shot of the sample lady (because she would even care), James always looks down at his sample and says the same thing: Oh my, i just remembered i don't eat meat. I guess you better eat this.

And i gobble his (well, i share with River)!

Now, you are probably laughing at me that i take my sample sneaking so seriously. Heck, the sample lady could probably care less if took two chicken wings instead of one. But i've lived a relatively low-key, no-trouble life (i live all the gangsta living up to my brothers), so this is my once a week to be a bad mamma jamma -- don't steal my thunder!

Potluck Friday

1. Do you know what today is? Nope, it’s not just Friday. Nope, it’s not just Potluck Friday. It’s the first day of Summer Fridays!!!! Summer Fridays means that my office closes at 3 p.m. every Friday until Labor Day! Jealous?! You should be! What What! But this also means that I have less time to do what I need to get done, so it will be a busy day…but oh so worth it to get off early!
   
   
2. So I went and saw Bridesmaids this week (if you are friends with me on Facebook, you know that I thought it was good--- some other(s) didn’t!). I think my favorite part of the whole movie was the cameo by Wilson Phillips. You can’t tell me that you don’t automatically sing aloud when you hear “Hold On”! And if you don’t sing out lout you are 1) lying or 2) not human. I think Wilson Phillips should be required to do a cameo in every movie!
   
   
   
3. Mornings out casa de ReRe-Ramblings are busy, but fun these days with Mr. Rivvy Riv in the house. They are so fun that James never wants them to change. I over heard him telling River this yesterday morning: River, when you’re 15, I still want you to come in our room in the mornings, lay across the bed while having your bottle and watch us get dress. Ummm, NOT gonna happen! (unless we move to Arkansas).
   
   
4. I just want to share that as i write this, i'm jamming to Hold On!!! I just couldn't help it! here it comes..wait for it it....Some day somebody's gonna make you wanna turn around and say goodbye....
   That is the JAM! but as i listen to the words, i've realized that it's a really "suck it up and stop being sad you big baby" message. Frasier Crane would not approve!
   
   
5. Other that Wilson Phillips, you know what else i'm jamming this week? A song with some of my favorite folks: "Give Me Everything" by Pitbull ft. Neyo (yeah!), Afrojack and Nayer. I actually shuck my booty to this song this morning in Zumba. Love it!
   
   

Another adventure in parenting

Yesterday i spread a blanket on the floor for Riv so we could have some fun with blocks. He chewed on the blocks and threw them at the dogs while i tried to turn our play time into some learning time.
I'd hold up a letter block and tell him what the letter was and a word that started with that letter.

"B is for Baby!"

"E is for Egg!"

Then i got to N and for some reason the first word that popped in my head was Negro.

So there i sat, holding up a wood block with a green N and said "N is for Negro."

River cracked up!

A couple of hours later i noticed James was playing the same game.

He held up a block with an F on it, paused, and said "F is for Funky Fresh."

So just our luck someone is gonna ask Riv his name and he's going to say "Funky Fresh Negro."

There is a reason why James and I have never been invited as guest stars on Sesame Street!

Potluck Friday

Happy Friday!

1. So i had every intention of getting up and watching the Royal Wedding. But clearly i don't know anything about time differences (besides East Coast is one hour ahead of me and West Coast is 2 hours behind me) so i when i got up at 6 a.m. i was so freaking confused that the wedding was over. My first thought was "who the heck gets married this freaking early in the morning?!" But apparently England's time is WAYYY different! Oh well, i've seen the highlights: Katie's dress was amazing and she looked gorgeous.
   
   Some of my thoughts on the event: Why is she now being called Princess "Katherine?" Yesterday it was fine to call her Kate or Katie, but now she's Katherine? Did she have to sign some kinda deal with the queen that she'd never go by the common name of Kate or Katie again? I still go by Princess ReRe. Another thing i noticed are all the big ugly hats the ladies (even the reporters covering the wedding) are sporting. Is that some kind of English wedding law? And if it is, those Brits need to get some lessons from some of my kin folks cus old British ladies WISH they could pull off a hat like a little old black church lady
   
   
2. James works with the elderly. And if you know one thing about the elderly it's that they just say what's on their mind. If you are fat, they are gonna tell ya. If they don't like ya, they are gonna tell ya. If they don't like Mexicans, they are gonna tell ya. So recently he was working with an elderly man. James pulled out his phone to read some notes and the man saw a pic of River and asked whose baby that was. James said it was his son and showed him a picture of both River and me. About 40 minutes later, the patient asked "It don't bother you being married to a black woman?" James asked him why it would bother him, but the patient just sputtered and said "i don't know" and changed the subject. I personally think James should have had a better response. Maybe something like:
   
   --Yes, it annoys the crap out of me. I've been waiting for the antifreeze to work for 6 years
   --She's BLACK?!
   --That's not a woman, that's a man. I love me some brothas.
   
   I can't wait until i'm old and can just say whatever the crap i want.
   
   
3. Speaking of old people who think they can say whatever the heck they want. Oklahoma's Sally Kern is at it again. I don't know why folks are acting like it's news that old Sally has said something dumb. This is the same woman who said the dudes from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" and Neil Patrick Harris were bigger threats than Osama Bin Laden. Clearly she has never watched anything on Bravo! If she had, she'd realize we need MORE Andy Cohens in our life and less...um...Sally Kerns. Her recent diarrhea of the mouth was a comment talking about how women and blacks don't work hard. Well booyah Sally, i'm black AND a woman, and i'm one of the hardest working folks i know. So put that in your denture cream and suck it!
   
   
4. Graduation count down is here! In about 2 weeks, yours truly will be honored with her Master's in Public Administration (emphasis in Nonprofit Management) -- well, as long as i get through this next week of papers! I'm so excited!
   
   
5. What's ReRe jamming this week? It's "Down On Me" by Jeremih and 50 Cent.