Determined moms choose Jif!

This photo essay is a run down of determination to have a PB&J sammich for lunch! I call it "Determined, desperate moms choose Jif!"

On my way home from the gym I got a craving for pb&j. I could taste it! I could feel the soft bread in my mouth!
Right before I got home, I remembered we were out of peanut butter. Nooooo.
I had Zumba legs and zero energy to walk very far so stopping at a legit grocery store was a no. So I pulled into Walgreens, praying it carried pb. Well I should have been more specific with my prayer and asked that they carry MY pb (I'm a Peter Pan girl).

I get to the PB aisle and my choices are: Jif, Skippy and generic pb called "Nice."

Umm the name "Nice" immediately turned me off. Nice?! Not yummy, or delicious? Nice, like the out of work weird dude you try to hook your friend up with. Pass.

And Skippy...well I learned a long time ago that the name is telling you exactly what you should do with that pb...skip it. Ewww

So I grabbed the Jif.

I immediately opened it in the car.... I'm classy! And stuck my finger in it ala Puck from the Real World (Pedro is looking down in shame). I didn't want to get my hopes up and get home to be disappointed. So I had to try it. And I'm happy to report it was tasty. Not Peter Pan good, but good enough!

So I got my sammich! I'm a happy girl!

James: The Black People Whisperer

It should be no surprise that after 8 years together, James has become well-versed in the world of black folks and black women. He knows to not ever splash my hair when we are swimming (heck, he knows to never touch my hair), he knows what ashy means, and he knows his vegetarian self should avoid all vegetables at my family reunions -- because there's a good chance there's a hamhock or some other piece of animal in it.

Knowing all of this about my husband, i still got a kick of him sharing his black folk knowledge in the last week through two interesting conversations.

Black Fact #1: Black Don't Crack

James: I met pretty cool guy at work today. We are going to hang out.
ReRe: Cool. How old is he.
James: Oh, i don't know. Maybe my age, maybe yours. He's a black guy and you can't ever tell how old black folks are cus black don't crack.
ReRe: True!

Black Fact #2: Black Folks eat Greens...not spinach

James and i recently spent a week in Westpointe, Virginia visiting my dad and step-mom. We had so much fun. I stuffed myself on southern food and sea food. James mostly ate cheerios and spaghetti. When we got back we went to visit James' mom to tel her about our trip and let River visit Grandma. I don't know how the subject of greens came up, but t was awesome hearing James try to explain what they were:

"Like salad?"
"No, greens, collard greens."
"Do you eat them cold."
"No, they are hot, usually with some pig fat in them."

This went back and forth, until finally I did the ultimate no-no -- comparing greens to their arch nemesis:

"They are like spinach, kind of. The black people version of spinach."

If Popeye was a brotha, he'd eat greens.

Potluck Friday

Happy Friday!!!

1. So this is the last Potluck Friday and my last blog post because apparently the world is going to end tomorrow -- and frankly i can think of a lot better things to be doing on my last day than sitting in front of the computer (no offense all of you World of Warcraft nerds, i mean lovers). Seriously though people, the world is not gonna end tomorrow. How do i know? Cus i have a direct line to God and he told me that the wack jobs or are saying tomorrow is the end would be the LAST people to know! So that's how i know we are all good!
   
   
2. Bagel lovers in Norman i have some EXCITING news. Old School Bagel Cafe is opening soon across the street from Norman High (where Blockbuster used to be)! It's about dang time the owners listened to me and opened in Norman, for pete's sake the opened in Stoolwater before they came here. But i digress. The important point is that we are getting one. If you haven't been to Old School, i highly recommend it. When i worked in the city i ate there on the regular. And every time i went to the counter to pick up my order i would say "Thank you, this would be even better if i could eat it in Norman." (this is also what i say when i pick up my food at Big Truck Tacos) . Finally someone listened! My only fear is that they didn't pick a great location. Yeah, Main Street is good in theory, but when you add hundreds of teens out for lunch at the same time every day that's just a mess. Maybe things have changed, but i remember when i was at Norman High and had no car my homies and I would just loiter at Grandy's and Carl's Junior (both of which are closed now) and would maybe buy 1 meal to share amongst 4 people! I got mad when some restaurants would put up signs like "Only 2 students per time" or "Must purchase own meal" etc. But i sooooooo get that now! But oh well, let's hope the kids of today are more respectful...or that they all are on diets so they can fit into their skinny jeans.
   
   
3. Why are people acting so surprised that The Terminator had an affair. Ummm, hello, he's a politician. This is NOT shocking or surprising. Well, maybe it's shocking because no one thought there was another woman on earth besides Maria Shriver who likes pillow talk that consists of spitting and screaming. But other than that I'm not surprised at all. And of course the news came out now. Arnold probably sent a dang press release. His run as governor is over and he probably wants to get back into the movies...what better way than a steamy affair with your maid?! Rumor has it he was planning a tiger's blood-induced crazy rant like Charlie Sheen, but he sees that really hasn't got Sheen so far, so he opted to go with revealing his affair.
   
   
4. Dear Glee, if you don't stop being all serious after school special and start make me start laughing I will stop watching you. Don't believe me? I stopped watching All My Children when they killed Leo and they are now being canceled (9 years later, but still!).
   
   
5. What's Re jamming this week? I'm jamming some Chris Brown's "Look at me now" ft. Lil Wayne and Busta. I LOVE Busta's part. It takes me back just hearing him. Busta is probably a grandpa, but the dude still has it!
   
   

Potluck Friday

1. First i must say that i think drugs are bad. BUT does it make me a bad person that i think some drugs are badder (yes i said badder) than other. It's kind of like a sin. You know, a sin is a sin is a sin. But in reality, some sins are worse than others. Coveting your neighbor's wife is a sin, but it's way better than going over there and choking your neighbor and hiding his body in the basement. So, any who, some drugs are badder than others, which is why i was doubly disappointed in the hotness that is T.I. when i read that not only was he arrested for drug possession, but one of those drugs was METH. Meth?!!!! Come on T.I. Have you not seen the Crystal Darkness documentary (I have a copy i can loan you and your wifey)? Have you never seen meth mouth? It's bad to get arrested for drugs at all, but to get arrested fro meth is even trashier. yuck.
   
2. Guess what i'm gonna be doing this weekend? Here are some clues: yellow cake with chocolate icing, lots of red drink and sweet tea, collard greens, fried chicken, dominoes, old dudes dancing and cuttin up, so loud you can't hear your own thoughts. If you said going to a family reunion, you are wrong. I'm going to a BLACK FOLKS family reunion. We get down different than any other folks and it's gonna be on! Did i ever tell you about the first time I took James to a reunion? We were in the food line and he leaned over and pointed to the collard greens and said "What's that?" I said "Greens." he replied "What are 'greens'?" And the entire dining hall got quiet and everyone looked at him like he was an alien. He now knows what greens are -- he can never forget.
   
3. James and i had fun last weekend in Texas, but it did make us appreciate a few things about Oklahoma (you never really appreciate what you got till you don't have it for a while):
   -- Smoke-free restaurants. I never realized how nice it was that Okiehoma restaurants are smoke free, until we were sitting at a Texas Chili's trying to enjoy our meal via burning eyes and the taste of Newports in our throats. ick! I was so confused when the hostess asked "Smoking or non-smoking?"
   
   --street signs that are easy to read. Maybe it's just a Waco thing, or maybe we are just dumb. But i think it's way easier to get around Okiehoma than Texas. Once you get off I-35, you are kinda SOL -- or at least we were. Mapquest and our android GPS didn't even know how to get us around Waco. But we figured it out.
   
   --good radio stations. Maybe i'd enjoy Texas stations if i was in to country, Spanish music, or (even worse) spanish country, but I'M NOT. The minute we crossed the border, the music went to crap. For goodness sakes, Beyonce is from Houston, so why is it so hard to find a station that allows me to drop it like it's hot while i drive?
   
4. I'm not gonna lie: I'm pretty excited about seeing Mike "The Situation" on Dancing with the Stars. I hope he dances shirt-less. Say what you want about Jersey Shore and "The Situation" but there's no denying that the boy's abs are fantabulous. He's no James, but it aint bad!
   
5. What is ReRe jamming this week? Well, i'm not usually a fan of Maroon 5, but i'm loving the song "Misery"
   

Sometimes Jack should stay in the box

What do Okies love more than guns and bibles? Apparently It's Jack in the Box. A Jack in the Box recently opened in Norman, right down the street from my house. It's been chaos for nearly 2 weeks. The drive-thru is regularly wrapped around the building -- sometimes spilling into traffic. It got so bad the other day that Jack had a cop directing drive-thru traffic.

The parking lot is jammed full -- you'd think Michael Jackson had come back from the dead.

So yesterday i decided to see what all the fuss was about. My mama loved her some Jack in the Box. Anytime i took trip to Texas she'd always make my roomies and me bring her back 10 tacos. She'd freeze them and eat them at her convenience. I never tried one of the tacos because something just didn't feel right about buying some food, driving it 3 hours to my house, freezing it and then eating it. But that's just me.

Anywhoo. When i pulled into Jack, it was busy, but nothing compared to what it's been. I used this nifty little kiosk thing to order my food. Basically i did all the work but cook my food. I decided to get a couple of things to try -- don't judge, i'm pregnant.

I was amazed that the tacos were 2 for 99 cents. So i got two tacos, some jalapeno cheddar bites and some cheesy-bacon wedges. I waited for a good 15 minutes for my food -- i did meet a nice lady in line who told me about a good day care.

When they finally called #990 i nearly started drooling just thinking about how good my food was gonna be as i ate and watched some One Life to Live.

I drove home -- too fast i'm sure.

The first thing i sank my teeth in to was a taco. At first i was a little disturbed when i saw how flat and greasy it looked. But i took a bite anyway. I should have went with my first instinct.

YUCK. Seriously?

I took two more bites, thinking that maybe it would get better. It didn't. Opted to leave the 2nd taco uneaten.

My next move was a jalapeno popper. The first one was just filled with cheese -- no jalapeno. The next 3 were OK -- but no Sonic Ched 'R' Pepper.

I thought i'd saved the best for last. How can you mess up potato wedges with cheese and bacon bits and sour cream? I don't know how -- but clearly Jack does. They were no good. Kind of cold, kind of mushy. No seasonings and topped with fake bacon bits.

I know Jack does burgers, and i'm praying he does them better than the tacos and other crap i tried.

For you Jack lovers, please PLEASE tell me the appeal.

Potluck Friday

TGIF. Folks have been looking for my blog, so spread the word that it's now here.

1. So, yesterday i saw a man relieving himself -- and it wasn't my husband. I'm embarrassed to tell this story, but it must be told: I went to Hideaway Pizza to meet my girl Kerra for lunch. While i was waiting on her, i went to the bathroom. The restrooms at this particular Hideaway are confusing. You walk through one door labeled "restrooms" and then you go to the gender appropriate restroom. That was not hard. But when i came out of the bathroom, i got confused as to which door was the way to the lobby. I chose the door i thought was correct, but instead came face to face with a guy peeing. At first i was confused: "why is this guy peeing in the lobby?" And then i realized that I had went through the wrong door and was standing in the men's bathroom. Instead of rushing out quickly, my manners kicked in and I apologized a thousand times.
   
2. The Hideaway fun did not stop there. After telling Kerra my story, she spotted a guy wearing a size smedium (not a small, but not a medium) T-shirt that said "I love my girlfriend." He was also wearing the tightest pair of stonewashed jean shorts. Kerra and i looked at each other:
   Kerra: How much you wanna bet the guy's shirt is lying. I doubt he loves his girlfriend.
   ReRe: Oh, he loves someone, but it's not a girl.
   
3. I recently was almost run over by a Prius. Those little tree-hugging cars are so quiet! We need to use those over in Iraq and Afghanistan -- the enemy wouldn't even know we were coming.
   
4. What am i jamming this week? It's another oldie but goodie. MC Hammer's 2 Legit 2 Quit. I was in 3rd Grade when this came out and i had to correct my mom when i heard her singing: "Do the jerk, do the jerk and twist."
   

I'm ReRe, and i'm a junk food addict

A recent study says that junk food is addictive like drugs and the same feelings given off after binging on some goodies is similar to the high folks get when using cocaine and other drugs. Now, i'm no expert, but from my own experience in eating tasty goodness i can say that i agree. There's not much difference between a heroine addict on a trip and ReRe eating a fried snickers at the Medieval Fair. No, i've never committed crimes or harmed my family to get my hands on a juicy fried chicken wing or a double stuffed Oreo, but i have said things like:

"I can stop (eating this bag of chips) anytime."

"Tomorrow I'm quitting (and going on a diet)."

Some folks need the Betty Ford Center, some folks need the Betty Crocker Center.

Med Fair 2010 (it's not what you think)

So when the alarm went off this morning i was tempted to hit snooze and skip the gym, but then i had a flashback of all the delicious things i ate at the Medieval Fair over the weekend. My diet consisted of: a slice of pepperoni pizza, a 1/3 of a funnel cake, two lemonades (one blueberry and one strawberry), chicken on a stick with rice, a corn dog, an ice cream cone, a snow cone, a bite of a fried snickers, a bite of fried egg plant. I'm sure i had some other things over my two-day visit, but i've surpressed the memories. The food was not the only delicious part of the Medieval Fair. Some of my favorite quotes:

"Hey bro, ain't nothing better than a black man in a kilt." -- guy who was trying to get my little brother to buy a kilt.

"If you are Asian, you shouldn't come to the Medieval Fair and eat rice!" --T. Marie, annoyed when she saw an Asian kid eating stir fry.

"So i guess i shouldn't have had the chicken on a stick yesterday?" -- ReRe, responding to T. Marie's Asian comment.

Some of my favorite sites at the fair:

a black guy dressed in Medieval garb. I've been going to Med Fair for over 20 years and have NEVER seen a black person dressed up. I thought we knew better than that, but apparently we don't.

All the raccoon tails hanging out the back of folks' pants. Since when is this Medieval?

The guy dressed as a pirate pushing a set of triplets. I'm sure child welfare should investigate.

All the boobies. Young boobies, old boobies. The Med Fair is a boob man -- and infants -- heaven!

My favorite things to do at Med Fair:
Eat
complain about how much i ate
stalk inappropriately dressed people so i can take their picture
make fun of what folks are wearing

(Blogger's Note: Blogger is being cranky this morning and not letting me upload photos...)